I am very appreciative when someone contacts me to set me up with an eligible meidel. Being someone who wasn’t fortunate enough to find his bashert on his first date or in elementary school, I am very grateful when someone takes the time to think of me in this regard. However, sometimes you get those suggestions that are so out of whack, and so not practical that it makes you wonder “Is this person for real?” Just the other day I got one of these off the wall suggestion and it got me thinking that there are really 4 basic categories of compatibility that shaddchanim should keep in mind before setting up two people: 1) Geographic location, 2) Physical compatibility, 3) Age range, and 4) Religious level.

“Perseverance!” I feel that word sums up the approach that successful people take towards life. It’s the ability to keep pushing forward, despite the obstacles in your way, until you finally succeed. I have adopted this attitude to my own life and have often been lucky/fortunate enough to experience success. Whether it’s in the job market, academics, or athletics, it has always been my philosophy that if I work hard enough I WILL succeed. The one area that my perseverance has not only failed, but has actually backfired is in the world of shidduchim! I find the shidduch game to be different from other parts of life. It seems like the same rules that bring success in virtually every other area, do not apply in the effort of trying to attract a mate.

I have a confession to make! I have yet to share this confession with anyone! I haven’t told my parents, my brothers, or even my close friends! However, I figure that now is as good a time as any to share it, and what better audience to share it with then you – the 1000s of people I don’t know all over the world (some of whom are stalking me) who read my blog! My confession is that I’ve been having a series of dreams! Not Martin Luther King Jr. style dreams of hope and achdut among all nations, rather these are much more frightening. The dreams I’ve been having are all very similar in nature. The dream usually starts with me at some type of social event.

There is no such thing as a shidduch crisis! Sorry to break the news to all those shaddchanim and dating sites that have leveraged that phrase to market their services, but the fact of the matter is we have blown this whole shidduch dating thing completely out of proportion! If you speak with people outside [...]